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I wrote this page because of problems I once had, resolved, and I hope to research on this further.

I once heard of a case where doctors had performed an autopsy on someone and found his intestines to be plugged with a cake-hard substance having the smallest pinhole for the poop to get through. I guess the guy must have had the worst case of the runs during the latter part of his life, and I'd assume that this condition must have been a large reason to do with his death.
I've also heard of an Australian Olympic athlete who died shortly before competing, and when they did an autopsy on her, they found her intestines plugged with cheese. She apparently absolutely LOVED cheese pizza.

For me, if you want to hear my gruesome problem, first of all I developed hemorrhoids after riding for 40km a bike I borrowed one day, on a hard bicycle seat and after not riding the bike for well over a decade. I was bleeding in my stool (crap) and I guess it took me a while to find and approach the problem with a solution, as it tended to linger for many years (I generally avoid surgery and medication at all costs). For years I would have a bad case of diarrhea and sometimes a scary amount of blood in my stool. One possible reason for this is the bad way in which I terminated one of my fasting periods, leading to an ultimate burning ring of fire. I've been eating hot chilies and food all my life, and the way people see me eat they have often comment that I must have "guts of steel". But I guess with the way I damaged or abused them from two points of attack like this might have weakened them to where they were bleeding so much. On one of my fasts I also regularly did the colon flush < , which I was later informed could weaken my intestines. By excessively cleaning it and leaving it empty for a longer period of time (my longest fast was 19.5 days), I might have weakened them, and I later read that it takes a while to heal intestines in general.

I hear of people who have the case of severe diarrhea, or constipation, and for which they might take various medication, but I have found that by proper eating and proper crapping one can bring their intestines back to a healthy condition, even if this may take a longer time.

If your intestines have become weaker like mine have, then you simply have to be kind to them for a longer period of time until they come back to health. For me, and probably for anyone, this simply meant holding back on the hot stuff until my stool looked regularly healthy. It is always good to examine your poo, and to note the aroma as well. If it really stinks something unhealthy, you should consider the diet you are eating. If it smells really unhealthy and toxic, imagine how many hours and days such unhealthy toxic substances are lying dormant in your intestines. If you are not relieving yourself properly (taking proper and thorough craps), this toxic and possibly poisonous gunk will probably be seeping through your intestinal walls, into your blood stream and polluting your body. If you eat crap (unhealthy food, possibly laced with dangerous chemicals), your liver (your body's filter < mention liver cleans) will try to remove and process the poison, as well as your kidney, your stomach will pass it on while trying to extract only the healthy stuff, but then it oozes its way slowly through your long (I believe around 25 feet < ) intestines, and if you are not emptying yourself properly, it will sit their dormant, eating away at and destroying your intestinal walls, weakening them, with the very poisons all the previous organs have worked hard to get rid of to pass out of the system now seeping uncontrollably and directly into your blood stream! A very bad scenario.

Many times I see how people stuff their faces, gorging on anything that suits their fancy (visual and taste of tongue stimulation) without giving any thought to the possible consequences, somehow assuming that their body is expendable, or a wonderful machine that will correctly deal with the garbage they are feeding it. Surviving on plastic covered hot dogs without really investigating what those plastic sleeves are stuffed with - perhaps the guts and entrails and remains from a chicken factory, mixed with some healthy meat, food colouring and chemicals. Yuck.
On the other hand, the same people could spend an immense amount of attention washing and waxing their cars on Sundays. Perhaps buy better quality oil and gas for their beloved cars. Or when they cook, they correctly pour grease from the pan into an emptied pickle jar and not down the drain. For they know that the grease will clog their drain and they will have to clean it, by pouring into it some super toxic chemical which will find its way into nature and our water supply, and possibly pumping their piping with a toilet plunger.
But their kitchen sink piping is made out of thick metal and it can handle this abuse and pressure. Your intestines certainly are not. Yet the same people practically pour grease down their throats with the stuff they eat. Grease and fat is apparently addictive, which is why fast food joints go out of their way to stuff their foods with it. And look at the state of the average American. That immensely obese animal which survives on such fast food more than any other nation.
Changing your diet away from this poison and towards leaner meat, vegetables, and generally healthy food will go a long way towards extending your life and helping you maintain a lean and healthy body. Not to mention of clogged arteries and greatly increasing the chance of cardiac arrest (heart attack) due to such greasy unhealthy eating, especially if you combine that with smoking cigarettes and a stagnant lifestyle without any exercise. What an immense abuse of the body, pounding it with such poisons for a long period of time. When you are young, your body is more able to handle such abuse. But as you get older your metabolism decreases (especially if you do not exercise), and your body simply is not able to process all this toxic waste like it used to. So it is not able to get rid of it properly, and begins to stuffed it in this corner and that, swept under the carpet here and there, and you begin to bulge out in a most unhealthy way. Just take your clothes off one day and take a long hard look at yourself in a standup mirror. You can practically see all that crap and unhealthy food bulging out of you, your poor body not able to process the sheer volume of it.

And yet people can think that this is some natural state. Perhaps they don't care at all, or have resigned to it as the way of life.
Not at all my friends. If you think logically and with simple common sense, simply by putting in healthier food and helping your body a bit, you can reverse this trend, and over the years your body will be able to catch up and slowly get rid of all this junk you were feeding it too fast for it to get rid of.

There are several things you will have to do.
First of all, the more exercise the better. I know, a horrible word and you've heard it a thousand times until it's making you sick just thinking about it. But it really does not have to be painful. The important point is movement. You don't have to go to the weight room, but walk when you can. Your thighs are your body's biggest muscles, and exercising them forces your body to pump a lot of blood. When you increase your blood circulation like this, you are exercising your heart (very good for you), and the increased circulation and higher metabolism means that your body can process any junk within it at a faster pace. Don't force yourself to do some horribly painful jog, and get all sweaty to the point that you hate the idea and cant possibly motivate yourself to repeat it the next day, or never. But increase your daily activity slowly and at a leisurely pace. If you get off the bus two stops early on the way to work, walk through a nice park, and find yourself panting once you get to your destination, well, keep it to two blocks then, or cut back to one block. But if you do this every day or two, within a week you will not find yourself panting after such a short walk. Which is when you can increase the distance with ease, until you might get to my point, where I like to run up escalators, initially two steps at a time, then walking two steps at a time, to end up at the top (some escalators can be long indeed) walking one step at a time but with both my thighs burning nicely, a very slight film of sweat produced, and my heart pounding a bit. With little quick exercises like this you can keep your body in fairly good shape. I almost never take the elevator. I walk almost everywhere, or jog there, always finding on a map a nice route through tree-lined residential areas or parks, so it is quite a pleasant experience. Many times I will get somewhere walking faster than by public transportation, when you count the time from door to door (average time waiting at the stop, walking to the stop etc.). I can do a half jog, walking intermittently, always to the point before I start to sweat, so that I can arrive at my destination faster than the public transportation system and with almost no sweat at all.
So you can think of ways how to exercise, multi task so to speak, in such a way that it will not consume any extra time during your day, and not be a painful and regretful experience for you. This will increase your body's metabolism to the point that it will be much better able to process any junk you might eat.

And try to shift your diet away from such junk, for God's sake. Sure, I like to go to McDonald's once in a while, or eat an unhealthy hotdog, or a bag of chips with coke etc., but I'm always conscious of whatever I put in my mouth. I read the package. You know, it is not that difficult to find a bag of chips (or snacks - such as a granola bar) that is more healthy.
Once again, if you make a slow transition in this department as well, your shift will not be a painful and torturous experience. The important point is not to go overboard to the point that you abandon your intentions. Go as slow as you need, but be resolute in your shift. And you will find that your tastebuds will change accordingly. When I decided I wanted to go veg head (vegetarian), at first I craved for meat, but over time my body almost became repulsed at the idea of meat and looked forward with salivation at the prospect of eating a delicious salad-only dinner. Below you will find some simple healthy recipes which work for me. It really is not difficult to eat healthy, cheaply, and it can be a joy to cook and eat such healthy food.

Now if you take care of these two points you will go a long way towards a healthy body, and healthy intestines. It does not really make sense for me to go into great detail about healthy intestines if you are regularly pounding your system with garbage, and if you are inactive.
Once you have attained the above state to some degree, we can proceed to focus on your intestines (although you can certainly focus on everything at the same time).
Your intestines, in a healthy state, apparently maintains some bacterial balance. Like a swamp which helps keep a lake clean. Full of certain types of bugs which eat the bad stuff. In India they are designing swamps which process, in a natural way, a large city's entire waste.
Your intestines are similar, and if it is coming out as hard as a brick or as runny as Niagara, it is a sign to you that you are doing something wrong. One way you can regulate the bacteria is by drinking Kefir every day. I think it is supposed to be similar to buttermilk. It introduces a certain bacteria into your system to help maintain your intestinal ecology the way it should be. I bought mine flavoured with strawberries, found it delicious, and enjoyed drinking two small cartons a day.
You should also regulate your poo. I know, sounds pretty funny doesn't it? But it makes total sense to examine what comes out. If my poop smells bad, I always think back to what I ate that day or the day before, and decide to try and avoid it. I also pay attention to how my stomach feels and my body in general after eating crap food. So I gauge my body this way, watching what I put into it, paying attention to how I feel afterwards, and examining what comes out.
Okay, I got some weird friends, and you don't have to go their extreme by taking your dumps in the bathtub so that you can rub your poo between your fingers, examine it close up and smell it. Or perhaps you are not blessed with the toilets they make in the Czech Republic: a little platform which is later washed into a smaller hole. A platform where you can feel the heat of your poop warming your thighs as you sit, the aroma fills up the entire cabin to the point of tears, and you can examine it as thoroughly as you want afterwards. Someone told me that they designed those toilets at a time when people had problems with worms in their stool - to give them an opportunity to examine their poo in greater detail.
Anyway, it's only your poo, and it is a product of what you eat, so there is no great reason to get all weasy and "ooh, that's SO gross!" about it. Really, it's just left-over food that your body did not want, plus dead red blood cells. No great trauma. Unless of course you pig out regularly on crap and unhealthy food, such that the product coming out the other end is toxic stinky and mighty disgusting looking. I can promise you that my poop practically smells like flowers and has a nice texture, and I do not consider it disgusting to look at.
So do not treat your poo with such disgust. As some sort of bad evidence you want to conceal and flush out of your sight as quickly as possible, but as something that you can examine and use to regulate your body and what you put into it.

I've been told that pork and beef are generally bad, because, in different ways, they help clog your intestines. So try to cut down those, try to eat only the lean and healthy stuff, and in between it eat stuff that helps flush out your system. Like for example Spinach salad. With a healthy dose of olive oil (very healthy for you), some good vinegar, squeezed lemon, a bit of spice, perhaps grated cheese, maybe even diced apples, and you have a rather delicious and very healthy meal which you can whip up in no time flat. Or use Romaine lettuce. Apparently Boston or Ice salad does not have much nutritional value. Go to your local health food shop and start asking lots of questions. Eat long grain brown rice rather than white processed rice. Sure, it might take 40 to 50 minutes to cook, but if you do it properly it requires no maintenance < . Just throw it on the stove, during which time you can do lots of other stuff. I live in a caravan truck and do not have a convenient kitchen at all, yet I eat very healthily. So you have no excuse! Oh yes, and I like to throw sesame seeds on practically everything (soup, salad). There are very easy ways to eat healthy and not spend hours and a thick wallet doing it.

You can also try the intestinal flush < once in a while. Like plugging your garden hose into an outdoor faucet and turning it on full blast. Really clean out all the dead leaves accumulated over the winter. Your body works on the same principle as your car and your kitchen sink. So just give it an equal amount of attention, and you will find yourself getting much healthier in ways you might not have dreamed of. Which will allow you to enjoy life much more, and that blasted car, if you really need it.

Below I have prepared the stuff I generally like to eat and find easy to make. I don't have hours to kill a day on cooking either. Living in a truck, I generally like to reserve cooking for the weekends. I'll allow myself fast food occasionally during the week, but I make an effort to find healthy fast food (not that difficult), and in between that I have my healthy food. And now I can enjoy practically all the hot peppers I want (great joy). My intestines have become healthy again, no more blood, and great texture. For example, for a few years I'd always have painful diarrhea the next morning after eating only a few hot peppers. I guess my diet of beer, hot peppers, bread and sardines wasn't a healthy combination. But there was not that much else available in the area I was in at the time. The important point is that I noted the problem and experimented with my diet until I found what the problem was and determined a solution. If I get constipated, the next day I'll eat more green leafy salad stuff. If I get the runs too much, I'll have some chicken. Just experiment and gauge your poo until you find a good diet that works for you. But think about it and pay attention. And this way you should become a healthy and happy person. :o)

Here is generally my easy and healthy diet. I'm 42 and people keep guessing I'm between 24 and 30, so I must be doing something right!

Various Healthy Recipes

Olive oil, olive oil, and more olive oil. Apparently you can have as much as you want. Actually cleans and unplugs your arteries. Don't waste your time with the extra virgin stuff, which sounds good but is further processed and has less nutrients. Cook with it, pour it into your salad, and drink it with disgust during your annual liver cleanse < , ha ha.

Here's some easy salad recipes:
In an emptied pickle jar make your salad dressing in advance, so that the flavours can merge and blend by the time you are finished your salad. You will have to experiment with the dressing until you get it the way you like it.
Basically a bunch of olive oil, a bit of tasty red (or white) wine vinegar. You can also try Balsamic vinegar, or other fancy vinegar. Again, experiment over time until you get the dressing you like. Then squeeze in a half or full head of lemon. Add Dijon or favourite tasty mustard. At this point I take a butter knife, mix the stuff, and start tasting it. You want to get the balance of these previous ingredients right before you move on. If you make too much, big deal. Put the cover on the pickle jar and throw it in the fridge. It will only taste better tomorrow, and the day after.
At this point I like to dice up half a bulb of garlic, so that it can start soaking. I'm a garlic freak, where garlic also has many positive health effects. And your body shouldn't stink if you use it regularly (cleans your pores - so the first time you might be stinky, because you got stinky clogged pores dude!), and not too excessively.
Then I like to add dill, lots of freshly ground pepper, perhaps some flavoured vegetable salt, maybe ground garlic powder, thyme, oregano etc. I LOVE caraway seeds and this goes into everything I cook, but a lot of people don't like that. You can buy fresh basil or other green herbs and dice that into it. Experiment and enjoy.
Then I like to dice in stinky cheese. Mouldy cheese with lots of strong aroma. Put in only a little bit if you are scared. Or just grind in cheddar or other cheese over top of the salad at the end.
Sometimes I would dice apples into my salad and it adds an interesting and sweet crunch. You might try raisins, although I'm not a big fan of it. Perhaps carrot shavings with your raisins, but again, I do not like carrot with my salad. We all have different taste buds. Feel free to experiment. Some people detest mustard in their salad, or anything.
Oh, and sprinkle a bunch of sesame seeds at the end. Nice crunch and flavour. You can also try sesame seed oil, or flax seeds, or try different oils like rape oil or flax oil. All are healthy. Stay well away from regular table oil. The healthy oil is not much more expensive, but will make a big difference on your body.
For the salad part get healthy green stuff, and you can throw into that diced tomatoes, green peppers, even bananas and nectarines. Go wild. I often go simple just because I couldn't be bothered, but once in a while I'll throw in this and that based on my mood. You can usually whip up a big fat bowl fairly quickly. I'm quite content to have only that for dinner. But you can certainly eat a granola bar etc. for a snack afterwards. Just make sure you throw healthy and tasty stuff into it, and imagine how it will clean your system and feed your body delicious healthy food, slowly pushing out that bad stuff which has accumulated over the years.

Super duper vegetable soup:
Pretty easy, as you just throw into this simple recipe everything you feel like.
To start, get your big pot of soup (might as well make enough for several days, no?) and start sizzling in the bottom those vegetables which need longer sizzling. Like ginger root and onions, for example. Sizzle it in healthy oil, such as olive oil. I also like to buy different healthy oils that I find in the local health food shop. Some oils don't cook well on high heat and lose their nutritional value, so make sure you ask at the store. You can throw it in at the end or after the initial sizzle period.
Ginger root, by the way, is very very healthy for you. You get used to the flavour after a while and learn to appreciate it.
So once your sizzle base is complete (during this period, obviously, you can be very useful and be cutting all the other vegetables), I might throw in half my garlic, and other softer vegetables, such as green peppers etc. Some people practically like to sizzle to death their tomatoes. Actually makes an interesting flavour. Feel free to experiment.
But note that you only need a certain amount of oil (a small pond to keep it from sticking to the bottom and in anticipation of all the other vegetables you will be adding, and how it will be diluted within the pot later), where you sprinkle in a bit of water to help the cooking. But don't sprinkle in any water during the sizzle period. Onions should be browned, I'm told. Feel free to dip your nose into the pot, or nibble away, until you feel it is done. A soggy mushy onion in soup is not so tasty. Keep it tasty right from the beginning.
I like to put half my garlic in at the end of the sizzle period, because you don't want to overcook garlic, but I like it's flavours permeating all through the other softer vegetables I soon throw on top. Then I add about a quarter of the garlic half way through the soup, and the rest near the end, to reaaaally get that sharp garlicy flavour going. Again, as I mentioned above, if you eat garlic regularly, you don't get stinky. But don't go over the magic threshold (I find around a half to full bulb a day).
Now at around this point, when you are adding the softer vegetables and start to add a bit of water, this is when you can go spice crazy. I like lots of curry, of course my usual caraway seeds, and just go nuts according to your tastes, always making sure to taste the soup as you add stuff. Keep in mind that certain spices, like caraway, take a while to release their flavours, so taste gradually as you are cooking and spicing away.
As the softer vegetables (softer meaning they don't need to be cooked as long to get the right mushy texture and release their flavours - something you have to experiment in) are getting closer to done I can add the even softer vegetables, all the while adding the spice, to taste. Actually, you should try to put most of your spices in after the sizzle phase, so that the spices have time to merge with the water into a delicious and powerful gunk. Make it powerful, keeping in mind that your pot will be full by the time you're done and the spice will be diluted. You can always add a bit more spice near the end. I certainly do!
So once you're basically done with your "vegetable base", meaning it is soft and cooked enough, permeated well with the spices, then you are ready to turn it into soup. For the vegetable phase, you can practically add whatever you like. Sometimes I'd go for a zucchini/eggplant combination as a primary base. Other times I would experiment with carrot shavings. Perhaps celery. Each vegetable has its own flavour. Some vegetables don't mix so well with others, or with certain spices, so this is something you'll have to experiment with over time. But always smell the aroma, taste, and experiment. Pretty well my soups are always delicious, no matter which direction I choose to go.
You can also throw in a package or part of a package of dried mushrooms. Don't waste your time with those industrial white mushrooms, which have no flavour or nutritional value, but the more expensive dried stuff can add a lot of interesting flavours to your soup.
I also like to throw in certain dried seaweeds. Make sure you soak your seaweed into water before you start your sizzling phase, and throw it in the pot (after draining the water) just before the conversion into soup phase. Seaweed has a lot of iron and protein, and is also very healthy for you. And has an interesting and delicious taste (can be salty, so keep this in mind when adding salt to your soup base).
Oh yes, and make sure you put some salt in after the sizzle phase, because it apparently brings out the flavours of the vegetables much better.
Once I'm done adding everything, I find that my big pot can easily already be about half full of vegetables. Mnum mnum. If you really like meat, you can throw in some lean stuff during the sizzle period. Otherwise I eat meat when I eat meat, and eat only vegetables whenever I have the opportunity. And I find my soups are so delicious that no one EVER complains that they miss meat. There are so many bountiful flavours in the above raw ingredients that you really do not need to add meat.
But you can throw in a beef oxo cube. Perhaps chicken flavoured oxo cubes. But I find vegetable oxo cubes, perhaps garlic oxo cubes, and one or two beef ones can usually do the trick.
Now that you've built up this immense mound of healthy vegetables, you can throw in your water. But wait! Heck, maybe you want some rice with that? Or perhaps some noodles? Why not? So if I want to have some healthy brown rice carbs with my soup, I'll make sure to add less water (but don't forget that the noodles and/or rice, even precooked lentils, will expand and soak up a lot of water, so make sure to have enough water, otherwise your pot will soon like an unstirable cake). By the time I'm done, my pot is filled to the brim and I need some juicy biceps to stir around that heavy concoction. Oh, and don't forget the sesame seeds, or flax seeds. Yum yum.
Near the end is when I start adding the hot spices. That evil stuff I like very much. Chillies, hot peppers and all sorts.
Put on the lid, turn down the heat, and let simmer for at least 30 minutes until the flavours merge and everything is appropriately soft.
Oh, and instead of, or WITH, the rice, you can also consider precooked lentils. Possibly precooked beans. From your health food shop they also sell powdery stuff, like certain wheats, corn starch or ready-made soup adding mixtures, which is good to add to soup to thicken it. Just ask them and experiment. Near the end I also like to add some fancy and supremely healthy oils, for additional flavour.
So this pot is brewing away for as much as an hour, on very low heat, and you can imagine I'm visiting the stove every five minutes or so, making sure I don't burn the bottom layer, keep mixing, MUST keep tasting impatiently of course, perhaps add a little bit of spice every ten minutes to bring it to perfection. Usually I can't wait and I'm almost full by the time the soup is done. If you are on a tight budget, you can even get some healthy brown bread and eat it with that. But your soup can last up to about four days. I don't even bother putting mine in the fridge most of the time, and eat it within about three days. It can get boring after about three days. And the hour you've spent cutting vegetables and tending to your beautiful creation is saved on the other two days. So if you divide it up, you've only spent about 20 minutes of preparation per meal. Then again, I'm usually nibbling away at it all day, so you can include breakfast and lunch if you wanted, in which case you can probably knock it down to 5 to 10 minutes per meal. Now it becomes like fast food no? And super healthy.

Beans
You can apply the above principle and make chilli con carne, for example. I soak for maybe two days in water (add a bit of salt to speed up the soaking) a bunch of red kidney beans. You can get different colours.
Once that is done, do your sizzling stuff in one pan. With my kidneys and chilli I always prefer to use lean ground beef for flavouring. Vegetable chilli just doesn't thrill me as much, although it is still good.
So on onions and ginger and garlic grill till brown and done a big blob of lean ground beef. Mix with a wooden spatula to get all the little pieces browned. I like to spice this part differently. Usually the green spices, such as thyme and oregano, and lots of caraway.
In a separate pot I cook my veggies. Spicing the two batches separately can be a bit tricky, and I guess you have to be a bit of an artist like me. Oh yes, Dijon mustard into the meet pot. Again, experimentation is the key. Oh yes, and I almost ALWAYS cook with beer. Sometimes red wine. I love to sip on my beer and/or wine while standing over top of the stove, wafts of delicious aroma steaming my face and absorbing into my nostrils, perhaps taste a little bit with the wooden spoon in between sips, and then occasionally "oops! I accidentally spilled some beer into the pot! Oops! I accidentally spilt some wine into the pot! How terrible! Oops, I did it again!". Yup, cooking can be real fun indeed.
Once my two pots are done, I mix them up between the two, and most probably a third and fourth pot. Yah, I do this once a year and invite my friends. This monstrosity lasts a good 3 to four days. My friends bring over Tupper wear containers, and even so I'm still pigging out for four days. You can eat it with bread if you're poor. And make sure your friends return the favour! Cook for each other. It's fun, healthy, and you save time this way.
Now that you have your four monstrosities in four separate pots, filled in with the beans (put in the beans once your done sizzling and cooking the vegetables in separate pots), you can continue the spicing. Primarily I focus on the red spices at this stage. I make a wimpy batch for the crybaby guests. But after this has been simmering and brewing for at least 24 hours (again, a once a year project), I find the hot spices have blended so well that even the wimpos, with only a few tears shed, are gladly eating my prized pot of the hottest torture - my favourite blend.
Oh yes, bay leaves are good to cook with. Here I cook it into the beef sizzle stage. Add lots of soya sauce. Also applies to the veggie soup above.
You can make garlic bread toasted in the oven just to be extra fancy. I tell my guests to make the garlic bread, maybe bring and make some salad. Others I'll ask to bring some vanilla icecream, pineapples and strawberries. I order them to dice it up and we have that for desert at the end. A total gorge fest, and tastier and healthier than any restaurant. Everyone does a little bit of work, and you all party, drink beer/wine and enjoy each others company in the process. This is called a potluck. So again, once you divide this superbly delicious concoction into four days, including for all your friends and all the meals combined, and divide it by the personhours invested to make it, you are rapidly approaching fast food in terms of time spent per meal. You can bring this to work in a Tupperware container, eat it cold or throw it into the microwave. Just watch all the googly eyed coworkers walk by in the hallway and exclaim, "What is that fantastic aroma?!?" Tell them with pride about your fun party and soon enough everyone will be doing it, and the world will be saved! And we will all live longer and have great shits and healthy intestines! (Oh yah, I'm not supposed to mention those words in the recipe section.)

Well, I guess I could just go on and on and on about my various fantastic recipes. That just reminded me. I love organising these big potluck parties. Much healthier and tastier than going to any restaurant. Your friends can come at 6pm or whatever and help you cook. It's fun. You drink beer and the party begins. It's fun cutting vegetables and party talking. The mp3 player is playing in the background, so you can control the environment, unlike the cheesy music they often play in restaurants. You control exactly what you eat, and eat very healthily etc. But one time stood out the most, because a Ukrainian friend of mine invited two of his Russian friends. With thick Russian accents. And almost the whole evening they'd be standing above my big turtle aquarium (served as a barrier between the kitchen and the living room and had a big glass on top, so it became very useful as a stand up table and focal point in the party), their plates of various foods in front of them, gorging out with their hands and maybe fork, dipping into this and that, greasy (healthy oil) food dribbling down the sides of their mouths, stuffing their face in between frantic breaths, their eyes bulging out in total amazement, and the whole evening, both of them exclaiming in harmony: "Charlie! This is PRECISELY what the doctor ordered!" In their thick Russian accents, and I couldn't help but be tickled pink with satisfaction at hearing such praise.
But for all the other amazing dishes < I've made, although some not so healthy, you basically follow the principle of throwing in only healthy foods. Lots of vegetables. Cook. Spices. Simple. Make a big batch for several days. Bring it to work. Divide up the human hours by cost and food consumed, and you practically have fast food. During the week I'll entitle myself to the occasional fast food, but I'm always aware of it, and I try for healthy fast food when possible. Hey, a little sin in life can be the spice of life, but don't indulge and wallow in it like a pig in mud heaven. You don't really need to go that extreme. I'm sure your mouth is already savouring the thought of organising a potluck party like me.

But I always tell me friends with pride, as they are staggering out the door half drunk and with overfull bellies at the wee hours of morning after one of my fantastic gorge fests: "My friend, tomorrow morning will be a treat from me. Because you can look forward to an absolutely great shit!"

And this would have been a great way to end this page, on such a fine tone of humour and after you have wet your appetite on the delicious dishes explained above. But there was one other point I forgot to mention earlier, and might as well mention it now, after your reading eyes have feasted on such delicious dishes. And that is how to take a crap.
I know, you think this is obvious, but it's not. For millions of years our bodies have been evolving and developing, but only in the last few hundred years have we changed our crap position. This guy explains it well < . Basically, we've been squatting for millions of years, but now we are apparently sophisticated and "above" such crude and barbaric means, that we sit like the royalty for which the first bowls were invented. But this position is not good for good poopin. After I had my problems mentioned at the very beginning of this page, and with the hemerrhoids, I keenly searched for a solution, one of which was to start squatting. And I was amazed how easily it slid out and how nicely and fully I emptied myself. I didn't have to scream and hold the handle bars any longer. In public places you don't have to worry about hygiene. Just lift the seat with the edge of your shoe's soul, get up on the bowl with your shoes and squat. Try this at least twice a day. Don't let those toxins linger around in your system longer than they have to. Not like I suggested at some point in my caravan survival tips. Empty your pipes, thoroughly, at least twice a day, and don't squeeze your eyes out in the process, building up damaging pressure around your delicate intestines. Let it ooze out comfortably. You can push in your belly using your belly muscles, as I find this puts pressure on the guts area to help squeeze more out and loosen the inside contents to help release it. Take your time. Let the inner contents shift around as it is being emptied, so more can be emptied. Sometimes I find I can stand up for a few seconds and then get back down and even more is released. With the healthy diet above, and proper and thorough release through squatting, I am convinced that these two means were the most instrumental in returning my intestines to their healthy state, where now I can have all my beloved hot stuff without problems.

Below are some other links < I found on this subject. Happy poopin!

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