What is it?
Well, did some researching
and didn't get too much
information. What's more,
I'm getting bored of
this, so I'll just have
to tell you what I
know, blblblblblbl.
So like there were like
these real bad witches in
Northern Moravia (15th century).
But heck, they weren't
actually so bad but
rather the Catholic
church wanted to seize
some property so they
made up these stories
that certain chicks were
negotiating with the devil
and they simply had to be
burned at the stake. Terrible stuff
man.
Then I think it developed into
some custom which was supposed to
scare away winter or something.
Frigid winter it is indeed.
Anyway, it's grown into
this custom amongst
the expat community
here is Prague (and
some cool Czechs
who can tolerate these
directionless
lowlifes) to meet
up top here every year.
Some years (and I think
this year as well), the
hip drama dude organisers
in town create this drama
act where they make this
fake witch and go through
the ritual of burning the
life sized look alike in the
fire. Other years some dudes
brought out their heavy duty
stereo. Most years there's at
least live music. I'm gonna
bring my bongo.
Last year there were four of us
left and went over to the
Finnish Nokia dude's house
overlooking Malostranska
nam. and I started
making eggs (which
Eric immediately
barfed all over his
naked chest). Speaking
of naked chest, Jana
was bitchin' that it was
hot and that we as
males were allowed
to take off our shirts.
So I said, "take your shirt
off then." So she like did
right. Then, in the middle
of making the second batch
of eggs, these hands slide around
my waste from behind and start
unzipping my pants. I turn around
and I notice that these f*cking freaks
are all naked. Well, we certainly
couldn't stop here! so Eric
straps the bongo around his waste,
Olli straps his accordion around
his chest, I grab my harmonica
and Jana grabs a cigarette,
and there we all go,
buck raw naked, eleven
in the morning on the next
day after whitchburning
for a casual stroll through
Malostranska nam.
Eric and Olli kind of chickened out
and stayed rather on the edge of the
square accompanying us
musically while we slowly wandered
to the center of the square.
We were almost in the middle
and I said, "well, I guess that's
good enough." But no! Jana simply
had to go all out and made
me walk with her, slowly, very slowly, to the
opposite end of the square. Then
we walked around the corner
to where that cafe is and walked
to the edge of that (direction
towards Joe's). People started
turning their heads very slowly
and pretend that they do
not see what they see.
Jana casually ruffles
some guy's hair who
was also pretending
that he does not see
what he was seeing.
Then we walked back,
unfortunately slowly
again. I think 50 people
took pictures of us that
day. Many ran up hectically
asking, "what's the protest?",
to which we responded,
"we were born this way man."
Walked back up the stairs to
the safety and comfort of Olli's
abode to the background music
of sirens whipping by on the
street below apparently in
search of some naughty
people. Then we
hung with our various
small parts off the window
sill waving to tourists
coming by for about
half an hour, at least
until the cops finally came and were
pounding on the door.
But after this show,
the landlords of the building,
who previously never liked
the Finnish dude, decided
they love him and told the
cops to go for a picnic.

Anyway, the spirit is in the
air and if you want to take
part in this oozy evening,
come (yes, you may
bring clothes).

[Explanation of background sound:

An excerpt from Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven"

The text forward:
"Yes there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run,
there's still time to change the road you're on."

Backward at about half speed (at least what I hear):
"My sweet Satan. C'mon little child don't make me sad
there's power in Satan."
(mixed over with my voice of course)

Click here to download the MP3 file.]

Witch burning can also be referred to as witchburning, or carodejnice in Czech, or with Czech characters čarodejnice.